Water
by Alona the Evil Authoress
Summary: [rockman.EXE] Angst. Netto angst, if you want specifics. Odd, Linkin Park inspired angst written just minutes before midnight. [bits of shounen-ai, not too much][chapter 4! wow!]
1. Default Chapter

The surface of the water was smooth.  
  
The hand that held the glass was steady.  
  
"Netto? Is something wrong?"  
  
"No."  
  
Nothing was wrong, and yet everything. But how could he begin to explain? How could he know where to start, where the story started in reality? In all honesty, for all he knew, this could have begun in those few days before the N-1 Grand Prix, or much later, directly following it. However you looked at it, thought, whenever you assumed it began, Netto's feelings towards a certain blue-eyed Net Battler had changed from admiration and general friendship to something he did not even want to think about.  
  
"Are you sure? You don't look so good."  
  
"I'm fine."  
  
He stared past his mother's face at the wall, wanting to scream out that all was not 'fine', and it was all as far from 'fine' as it could get. Yet at the same time he kept pushing his emotions deeper and deeper within himself, trying to even deny them altogether, though he had learned long ago how hopeless that was.  
  
The water's surface trembled slightly  
  
The hand was clasped around the glass with a white-knuckled, too-tight grip, sending tremors through the clear plastic.  
  
"You haven't talked to any of you friends lately, Netto. Did you have a fight?"  
  
"No, mom."  
  
"Good. And what about that nice white haired boy? I think he called this afternoon."  
  
Small waves ruptured the crystal-smooth surface, some of the water lapping at the edges of the cup.  
  
The hand around it trembled now too, partly from rage, partly from despair, and partly from the tightness of the grip.  
  
"Enzan called?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"What did he want?"  
  
"He just wanted to talk. Maybe you should call him back."  
  
The waves on the water smoothed out as the glass was put down on a table.  
  
The hand slowly unwrapped itself from the smooth plastic.  
  
"Okay, I'll go call him now."  
  
"It's nearly eleven at night, he might be asleep, Netto."  
  
"It's okay, Enzan never sleeps."  
  
The water was perfectly smooth again.  
  
The hand had long ago abandoned the clear plastic making up the glass, and was now quickly dialing a phone number.  
  
"Ijuuin residence."  
  
"May I speak to Enzan?"  
  
"Who is this?"  
  
"Hikari Netto."  
  
There was some static at the other end of the phone.  
  
"Netto?"  
  
"Hello Enzan. You wanted to talk to me?"  
  
"Yes. It's been a bit of a slow day and I needed someone to talk to."  
  
"Oh."  
  
The water's surface shook violently, a few droplets spilling out.  
  
The hand was once again wrapped around the glass, clinging to it for dear life, sanity, or maybe both.  
  
The mere sound of that smooth voice made the hair on the back of Netto's neck stand on end. It was nearly enough to break down all his mental defenses and force him to spill his guts over the pone. But he remained in control. He was too scared to face utter rejection. He was cowardly enough to keep himself in constant suffering rather that be hurt. As long as he kept quiet, the pain was his own fault, not Enzan's. Enzan need not ever know of the feeling harbored towards him by his friend and rival.  
  
They spoke of trivial matters for just over an hour. The hand relaxed and some of the water was drunk.   
  
"Well, goodnight Netto."  
  
"Good night. And…"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"…nothing. Good night."  
  
Click. The phone was hung up on both sides.  
  
He water shook violently as the hand grabbed it.  
  
Crash.  
  
The water trickled over the floor and the bits of shattered plastic.  
  
"Netto! What was that?"  
  
"Nothing, mom. I just dropped the glass."  
  
He laughed a little, but he could feel the stinging at the back of his eyes. No. Once he cried over Enzan, there would be no more holding back. So he smiled through the pain, smiled through his inability to express such pure love, smiled even as his heart broke yet again.  
  
The broken plastic had been removed and the water wiped away, but it was still there.  
  
It was there just as Netto's pain was there, just as the scars he made on his soul every time he hung up without pouring out his soul were there.  
  
One day, the tears would take the place of the tap water, but that was not now. It would be a long while before Hikari Netto allowed himself a single tear over Ijuuin Enzan. 


	2. 2

AAAAIIIIEEEEE!! I got reviews! Reviews, reviews, reviews! Thank you all you people who reviewed! (even though there are only two of them -_-) Cookies to all of you! *hands out cookies*  
  
And now, for the second chapter! Enzan's side of the story!   
  
~*~*~*~  
  
The phone rang.  
  
Before the order could be given, a maid picked it up and put it to her ear.  
  
"Ijuuin residence."  
  
A pause.  
  
"Who is this?"  
  
She covered the receiver with her hand and turned to the boy sitting on the office chair.  
  
"Hikari Netto wishes to speak to you, Ijuuin-sama."   
  
He grabbed the phone unceremoniously from her hand and was about to say something, when he realized he had nothing to say. He didn't even know why he had wanted to talk to Netto in the first place.  
  
"Netto?"  
  
Enzan blinked in wonder. Was he really at such a loss for words that he had forgotten to call Netto by his surname? Even Blues, from Enzan's PET, gave a suppressed gasp of something that might have been shock.  
  
"Hello Enzan. You wanted to talk to me?"  
  
"Yes. It's been a bit of a slow day and I needed someone to talk to."  
  
"Oh."  
  
In reality, it had not been a slow day at all. Enzan had been kept busy most of the day with meetings and hand been in the middle of looking over a company earnings report even as Netto called. But sometime during the day, between two particularly stressful meetings, he had found himself dialing Netto's number on his sleek silver cell phone. Netto had not been available, and Enzan had asked his mother to inform him of the call. Overall, he had been acting a bit strange regarding Netto all day, and was desperately racking his mind for the cause of this oddity.  
  
They spoke for a while, before Enzan realized and pointed out that it was past midnight and both of them should have been getting to sleep. Of course, Enzan still had half a dozen reports to look over, assuring him little sleep until near dawn.  
  
"Well, good night Netto."  
  
There he was again. Calling Netto by his first name.  
  
"Good night. And…"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"…nothing. Good night."  
  
Netto hung up the phone, and Enzan did so as well. For some reason, Enzan felt as if there was something important he wasn't getting, some grave knowledge he was missing. What had Netto been trying to say to him before he had hastily hung up? Why did Enzan want to know so much?  
  
"Enzan-sama?"  
  
Enzan glanced swiftly at his PET. He had spaced out, apparently, pondering his own odd behavior and the conversation with Netto. Blues seemed to have gotten impatient, and had shaken Enzan from his stupor.  
  
  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"You still have work to do. Are you going to do it now?"  
  
"Of course."  
  
He picked up the disk and slipped it back into the computer at his desk, trawling through megabyte upon megabyte of information on stocks, profits, and expenses.   
  
Two hours later, finishing up the final report, Enzan heaved a sigh. He wished that for once he wasn't a vice-president, but a normal kid, like Netto. While Netto surely was a bit set apart from others due to his Navi, he was still able to live a much more normal life than Enzan could ever remember living.  
  
Again he was thinking about Netto. Enzan caught himself before his mind could trail off into any more thoughts pertaining to the spirited Net Battler.   
  
"Enzan-sama, is something wrong?"  
  
"No, why do you ask?"  
  
"Those reports should have taken you half an hour, forty five minutes at the most. There must have been something on your mind to delay you so much."  
  
"I guess."  
  
"So what were you thinking about?"  
  
"N- Hikari."  
  
Enzan had been about to say Netto's first name again, which would have convinced Blues beyond reasonable doubt that there was something wrong with him. As it was, Enzan wasn't positive that there wasn't something wrong with him.  
  
"You seem to be thinking a lot about him, Enzan-sama."  
  
It was a statement of an obvious fact. Enzan had picked up the phone and dialed Netto's number after a week of finding his mind on the subject of Netto. Of course, he had denied even thinking of him at first, but eventually he was forced to grudgingly accept it. But why, he wondered, were his thoughts so drawn? And what, he wondered again, had Netto been about to say?  
  
"Yes, I guess I do. Blues, what do you think I should do?"  
  
"What do you normally think?"  
  
"I don't know…"  
  
He trailed off, remembering how some of these thoughts were less than desirable, though they seemed to suggest that Netto was. Enzan hoped desperately that he wasn't blushing, as that would have shown up quite brightly on his pale cheeks. But alas, such hopes were futile.  
  
"You're blushing, Enzan-sama."  
  
The Net Battler shot his Navi a rueful glance.  
  
"So I am."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"I… don't know."  
  
Enzan linked. There were those three words again, those words he felt anyone weak for saying, and he had said them twice in as many minutes. And by far the most frustrating thing was that today he honestly didn't know. He didn't know why he was having un-rival-like thoughts about his rival, he didn't know why he had been so eager to talk to Netto, he didn't know when he had begun to think of Netto as his friend, and most of all (and most painful for his ego), he didn't know why he didn't know.  
  
"Blues, I'm tired. Wake me at six-thirty as usual."  
  
Without waiting for a response, two sleep-clouded blue eyes shut, and one white and black haired head fell down onto the desk. In mere milliseconds, Ijuuin Enzan was asleep, dreams still clouded with thoughts of Hikari Netto. A drop of water fell on the sleeping boy's face from a crack in the ceiling. Outside it was raining.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
You like? You hate? You wish to kill me because Enzan doesn't get it? Well, press that god damn button a review!   
  
Alona's Ego: *waits to be fed* 


	3. 3

Yup, I've finally updated. . ... I swear, I didn't mean to hold it up so long, I just got caught up with other things. I''ve been writing so much G-rated-ness it's ridiculous. o.o Go read my Dragon Knights fics. G-rated they may be, but they are angstariffic.   
  
..I don't believe I've been using a disclaimer lately, so here goes: I own nothing but a few Evangelion DVDS, an old laptop, and my own fics. So there. Don't sue me, the most you can get is fifteen dollars in nickels and dimes.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Rain blew through the open window. After fifteen minutes of fruitless attempts to close it, Netto had surrendered and sat on his bed. He sat there still, sometime during the middle of the night, staring at the wall. Occasionally, a drop of rain would blow onto his face, but he didn't bother to wipe it away. He knew the sky was crying, as he could not, triggered by the slow trickle of water from the broken glass.  
  
Slowly the net-battler dropped off to sleep, dreams tortured by the crashing glass and pouring rain. A ringing noise sounded through his pained sleep, bringing him to awareness. Netto sat up sharply, realizing that the ringing was his phone. He ran quickly from his bed to grab the phone seconds before the answering machine took effect.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Good morning, Hikari."  
  
"Enzan? What are you doing, calling me so early?"  
  
In reality, despite the annoyance in his tone, Netto was not angry at all. While his chest was constricting painfully at the sound of Enzan's voice, the fact that the boy was calling at all was enough to begin expanding a bubble of hope within him.  
  
"Polite as ever, I see."  
  
"If you're calling just to insult me…"  
  
"I'm not. Actually, I'd like to know it you'd like to come to the park with me. My physician decided I don't get out enough and need some fresh air."  
  
Netto's heart skipped a beat. Whatever his reasons, Ijuuin Enzan was inviting him to the park.  
  
"Okay. I'll come. When?"  
  
Netto heard a rush of breath from the other side of the like that may have been a relieved sigh.  
  
"In an hour or so. I'll come pick you up at your residence. Get ready, though, because I'm not going to wait on you."  
  
"Okay…"  
  
The agreement was unheard, because Enzan had already put the phone down by the time Netto had thought to say it. Netto set the phone down it its cradle and tried to figure out what could have possibly changed about his and Enzan's relationship. Less that twenty-four hours ago, Netto would have scoffed at anyone who told his that Enzan would invite him to the park. Now, even though he had heard it first-hand, he could still barely believe it.  
  
'There's got to be some other reason than what the doctor said,' he thought as he quickly dressed, 'There has to be more to it than just that.'  
  
Thus plagued, Netto didn't even remember the rain that had been falling heavily. At the moment, the sun was shining brightly, dying up the puddle that had collected under the window.   
  
"Netto? What are you doing up this early?"  
  
Netto looked up to see his mother standing in the open doorway of his room. She had apparently been walking past the door, and had heard movement inside it. Netto could not blame her for being surprised. It was common knowledge that he was almost never awake before noon on a weekend.  
  
"Enzan invited me to the park with him."  
  
"Oh?"  
  
"Yes. He's coming in less than an hour."  
  
"I see. Well, I'll hurry and make you some breakfast then."  
  
With a smile and a giggle, she walked off, presumably to the kitchen to make Netto's breakfast. Netto, meanwhile, was slowly returning to pondering his current dilemma. This time, however, the smell of buttered toast wafting from into the doorway was distracting his thoughts, and he ran to the kitchen to eat.  
  
Half an hour later, as Netto was jumpily pacing his room, the doorbell rang. He instantly bolted from his room and to the door.  
  
"Here goes!" he thought, his breath catching. 


	4. 4

It's amazing! I actually got chapter four out! It's the second to last chapter! Be amazed!   
  
...and in the next chapter you properly find out why the fic is called "Water", and hate me forever and ever and ever. =P.   
  
To answer MalikKitsune's question... I can't draw Enzan or Netto. x.x Why don't you draw something for it instead?   
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Another drop of water fell onto the sleeping boy's face, further soaking his hair and the collar of his vest. Seconds after the drop fell another one quickly followed it. Through the dripping the boy slept on, oblivious to the large puddle building on his desk.  
  
Just as the water was about to spill over the edge of the desk and onto the rich carpeting, a clock clicked six and the radio turned on. Instantly, as though he had been awake the entire time, the boy's head snapped up, eyes peering alertly through the dim dawn light.  
  
"Good morning, Enzan-sama."  
  
"Good morning, Blues. Anything on the agenda today?"  
  
"Nothing. You have the day off."  
  
Enzan nodded and stood up to stretch. It was rare that there was a day during which he wasn't forever rushing between meetings and net-battles. But when the days did come, as they did at times, Enzan was always at a loss for what to do. He could never decide on an activity, being far too accustomed to moving through his days based on a schedule.  
  
"What will you be doing today, Enzan-sama?"  
  
"I'm not sure. Perhaps I'll go somewhere."  
  
As he said this, he remembered something a member of one of yesterday's meetings had said in hushed tones to her neighbor.  
  
'That Ijuuin boy shouldn't be here. He should be out playing, like the rest of the children his age.'  
  
"Maybe… I'll go to the park."  
  
"The park, Enzan?"  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"I understand."  
  
The net-battler almost yelled at his Navi at this. 'You understand?' he wanted to shout, 'Then explain it to me, because I don't!' But he stayed quiet. Something else was nagging him. What purpose could he have to go to the park alone? He pondered this a while, pacing around his expansive study. Suddenly, he looked down to see that he was holding a phone in his hand, index finger hovering over the "Talk" button. Checking the number, Enzan was very annoyed to discover that he had been calling Netto.  
  
"Damn you, Hikari…!"  
  
"What was that, Enzan-sama?"  
  
"Nothing."  
  
The last thing Enzan wanted was for Blues to become any more suspicious. Despite this, and his brain's numerous protests, Enzan pounded the button under his finger, effectively placing the call.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
For a second, Enzan paused, unsure of what to say. It wasn't supposed to be this hard to speak to Netto.  
  
"Good morning, Hikari."  
  
After much thinking, that was the only phrase he had been able to muster. He could only hope that his voice had kept its customary cool despite his inner turmoil. It would most definitely not do to let Blues see how rattled he was.  
  
"Enzan? What are you doing, calling me so early?"  
  
'Excellent question,' Enzan thought, 'I wish I knew.'  
  
"Polite as ever, I see."  
  
He was only stalling for time, however, and wasn't truly upset. He was desperately searching for some way to excuse the phone call, not only to himself, but to Blues and Netto as well.  
  
"If you're just calling to insult me…"  
  
"I'm not."  
  
The reply was instant, totally unexpected, and took both boy and Navi by surprise.  
  
"Enzan-sama…"   
  
Enzan ignored him, knowing that anything he had to say would not help in the least.  
  
"Actually, I'd like to know if you'd like to come to the park with me. My physician decided I don't get out enough and need some fresh air."  
  
Enzan was shocked at himself. For the second time in as many days, he was forced to conceive lies to excuse his calls to Netto.   
  
"Okay. I'll come. When?"  
  
Without being willed, a sigh of relief escaped Enzan. Mentally he smacked himself again: Netto's refusal would not have been a disappointment.   
  
"In an hour or so. I'll come pick you up at your residence. Get ready, though, because I'm not going to wait on you."  
  
He dropped the phone instantly, not wanting to hear Netto's response to his cutting tones.   
  
"Blues, what's wrong with me?"  
  
Blues began speaking in a slightly guarded tone.  
  
"You're going on a date with your rival."  
  
Enzan glared at his Navi before whacking the side of his head with his hand. There was no way in the world Blues could have said what he had thought he'd said… right? Not wanting to hear any more of this, Enzan shut off his PET. The last thing he needed was a smart-mouthed Navi.   
  
He walked out of the mansion, the lack of work assuring him that he would not be needed or missed by the household. He decided on walking to Netto's house: the mile and a half walk would sufficiently tire him to prevent his mind from thinking too much if he did anything stupid.  
  
A forty-five minute walk filled with unpleasant and confusing thoughts, including a memory of Blues' last statement, brought Enzan to Netto's doorstep. He said his hand to knock, but stopped just short of the door, letting his hand fall back to his side.   
  
'Oh, what am I doing here?'  
  
But he knew it was too late for thoughts like that. Shaking himself over, he rapped lightly on the door. There was no turning back now…  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Blah. That one was longer than the other ones, but the next one will be more than twice as long if all goes well. *picks up pen-written manuscript and compares it to type version* ._.; ... didn't I keep /anything/ the same?!  
  
-Alona the Evil Authoress, Goddess of Angst, and Queen of Messing 


End file.
